HOW I MET MYSELF: And How You Can Meet Yourself - ebook

◄ 1 ►

WELCOME TO THE JOURNEY

The sky is not the limit. However, your belief system and perception of life and the world may be limiting you. Get inspired and embrace the journey of breaking through the cage of your own limitations, creating your own heaven on earth. By opening yourself to the world (called spiritual) that forms the hidden baseline of our lives, you can change your focus from matter and mind, supported by your ego, to light, faith and vibrations, which can lead you to becoming authentic and exploring the real magic of life.

With faith that the universe is more intelligent than our minds, which are handcuffed by the chains of mental slavery, the only thing you should consider doing to get there is to decide. Some things may require you to get uncomfortable, get out of yourself, and stand by; but the prize of living a life being who you really are is worth the pain.

This book introduces you to the field of spirituality as an approach to self-discovery and self-healing that can be achieved by anyone. It shows you how an IT project manager, father and husband changed his perspective and his reality. Its review of techniques and experiences, is meant to inspire you and give you extraordinary knowledge and awareness of the real self-healing abilities that are available to you. It is presented from the authentic perspective of someone who is not a spiritual guru, a doctor, a great master, a monk, nor as someone who has suffered from a serious illness or trauma, but someone whose work and life may be similar to yours. I’ve dedicated years of training and practice to find myself and to remind myself of who I really am. This manuscript introduces you to a pathway that everyone may start and immediately experience. From someone who was against and ignored all that was not physical or analytically proven, I transformed my life to include real self-awareness and perspective that changed everything and allowed me to release my true potential.

If you are new to energy, spirituality or shamanism, or have many doubts about it, I can shorten your self-convincing curve, save you lots of time and energy, and maybe even from sickness. If you are a practitioner of shamanism or energy healing medicine, you probably met many similar to me, and if not, I can help you broaden your perspective so you can take your work to the next level, opening even more to people who may give you no hope for a change now. If you are against spirituality, consider it a sect, religion, black magic, or witchcraft, and all that may create negative feelings or perceptions, there is a great chance that you may change your mind. Like myself and my clients, you will find here how profoundly opening to spirituality can change your life and consequently lead to real transformation and self-healing.

I believe it is time for people anywhere in the world to discover, explore, and develop the real potential that is within themselves. While being surrounded by conflicts, chaos, climate crises, stress and anxiety, living can be challenging and overwhelming, so looking from a new perspective is even more required. What served humanity for generations may be seeking adjustment and upgrade to continue. Spirituality, energy balance between masculine and feminine, self-mastery, and coherence may be fuelling the change that is inevitable. But let’s not get too serious; in the end, we are here to just enjoy this life, so don’t worry. You don’t have to do anything for now, just fasten your seatbelt and enjoy the read.

1.1 Starting the journey

Once upon a time, there was a man who thought all was going well. From his early years, he knew that hard work was required to bring a good life. He went to school, studied, got a decent job, got married, and had children. Between travels and his daily corporate job, he found moments to relax, party and have fun, often accompanied by a significant amount of alcohol. All was fine; life passed. He spread his way of thinking, which appeared to be reasonable and was aligned with tradition, common rules, society, the Catholic Church. It was the way he’d been brought by his parents and nurtured by his family and friends. He had a pretty good relationship as well, quite modern and not based on the old style of man and woman. Kind of a dream. Time passed. Parties were not enough. He kept looking for peace and security. Various crises occurred. Kids grew. Wealth was secured, with insurance and retirement plans set. However, there was a sense of chasing and running, running and chasing, never stopping, a sense of obligation to continue working and doing, doing and searching. Accompanied by a fear of missing out, memories of insecurity and deprivation. Whatever he did or achieved was never enough to feel truly fulfilled.

He never cared much about what people thought and, from the outside and in comparison to others, his life looked perfect. His family had a decent place to live and could travel. He was earning decent money, living a dream. Of course, others had more or were better him, but there was nothing he could do about that.

Despite the common sense his mind applied to his life, accompanied by hard work based on his upbringing, his bucket of life did not feel full. He was constantly chasing the unknown and felt no peace. He was always busy and only physically present in his life. He saw himself in family photos but did not remember being there. There was always something else he had to do, something his logic justified as more important than just being. Hours, days, tons of documents, emails, cases, issues and a never-ending thought process often led to anxiety. By trying to secure all of his options and doing everything perfectly, he could not, in the end, decide on anything. Every decision, even about small things, required a thorough analysis. Even after making a decision, another option always appeared to be better. An insanity was created by his ego, his strong logical thought processes, his brain...

He knew that he was selling his time, calling himself an ‘expensive bitch’ doing the work, that he was neither loved nor hated. That was okay, it was paying the bills. Ever since he’d left Poland, he’d had a boss who was good to him, either forcing him to change or guiding him toward his full potential, allowing him to focus and being flexible. He could not complain...

Despite being fairly young, his body started to show the first signs of fatigue, unwilling to respond as it was supposed to. Doctors only said it was nothing serious and that he was getting older (by default, doctors had a level of authority at this stage of his life). They explained it all logically and he could not complain – it was only going to get worse. And it did: accidents, damaged muscles, increased back pain. He’d had back pain since a basketball accident at age thirteen. It was what it was. ‘Life is hard’ and you are getting old.

Meanwhile, his son was growing up and he could feel a rising conflict and an inability to accept the boy as he was. He could not see his son as sunshine, smiling and positive; he saw him as someone who couldn’t do useful things and who just wanted to have fun. He wanted to see himself: the kid who had worked since the age of 8 and who had thought he was enjoying it; the kid who was bit of a handyman and could repair many things, from cars to electrical goods; who could garden and cook dinner; an organiser of all around him; with quite some abilities and high performance, wherever he was placed. These were capabilities that were seen as normal for a boy born in a Polish village in the 1980s and put to work early. As a result, he exaggerated his expectations embedded in his subconscious... they were his reality and his truth. The only truth he relied on – his own.

Despite solid analytical evidence and technical studies, he knew that something in his own truth, his perception of reality, was not always correct. This also applied to the reality created by his surroundings, his family and his community. There was nothing to reject, but he felt that it may not be the real truth and he could not justify how things were happening. He wanted one thing, but was receiving something that he did not want or was worried about. It made no logical sense. He could not agree with the statement that ‘life is hard’.

He had always been open to non-conventional medicine, acupuncture, traditional Chinese medicine (TCM), and ways that could not be justified by modern science or research but that worked! His son was diagnosed with asthma, but he could not believe the doctors’ statements that his son would have to take steroids for his entire life. This was not just one doctor, but an army of them and a hospital and various tests. So he jumped into research. A vegan diet, a five-element diet and TCM helped to get rid of the medications and made his son healthy and allergy-free. It took a lot of effort, but it worked. How could doctors be so misled in their recommendations? How could they use only drugs without making dietary recommendations?

Despite working in an analytical and mind-driven world, and despite a life of parties, alcohol and fun, something was pushing him to try various body cleansing methods. These impacted his way of thinking, preparing him for real understanding and change.

He studied continually, reviewed many courses and goal-setting exercises, read many books and drowned in knowledge. He found many examples of people who had changed miraculously or who had applied something in their life that worked and triggered change. But nothing worked for him. He tried many times. Joe Dispenza and Bruce Lipton did help but, in the end, he always ended up back at the same starting point. He gave up after a time, seeing none or very limited results. He was looping through these methods, still using the same way of thinking but expecting different results.

When living and working in Switzerland, he met Sabrina and Tom, who introduced him to the magic world of yoga and he glimpsed topics related to spirituality (auras, chakras, etc.). He thoroughly enjoyed learning about and practising yoga during their weekly class. However, he was still sceptical and did not understand all the background spiritual aspects.

Finally, someone recommended he meet a medicine women (shaman/spiritual guide), which started a totally new chapter of his life. He started to see who he was, what drove him and why he’d been looping with the same results for so long. After a significant cleansing of his beliefs and automatic ways of working, he started to study techniques that he could not understand with his mind or analyse. He took part in therapies and ceremonies and he travelled the world. These all brought him to the point where he changed almost totally. With gratitude, he said goodbye to his old self and made way for the new self. Step by step he opened up to his intuitions and feelings, still supported by his brain and his capabilities but from a totally new perspective. He discovered many skills that he’d never even thought about: witching, rituals, making things happen (alchemy of life). These became his reality.

While continuing in his daily job to pay the bills, he studied to change, held back by his analytical brain. He was lucky enough to be accompanied by a wise wife, who was also in the process of her own change. Supported by love, they motivated each other while developing a real understanding of who they were and that their life could look more different than they had ever imagined.

They each opened an online practice. She also opened a physical one in Spain. This IT Project Manager started to share what he had learned, helping others to look for the reasons for their illness or unhappiness, helping them to heal by opening their eyes to the reality and freedom outside of the cage created by their mind.

From the first moment of experiencing change and freeing himself from the shackles of his own Ego and mind-driven life, he wanted to shout about it and share it with the entire world. He began writing by gathering his reflections, drafting blog posts and recording voice notes. He started talking passionately about the changes with his friends and family. After some time, he understood that not everyone was ready to listen and started to direct his energy into writing. The idea of writing a book was born, despite his mind telling him not to. How could an IT manager write a book and help people with their internal changes? Insanity! Who are you to tell other people what to do outside of the IT field that you know so well? ‘Are you nuts?’ he asked himself. That is the story of this man who decided to share his journey with others, convinced that there are many people in a similar situation.

After years of inner work, transforming his reality, taking notes and journeying within, the time finally came when he began writing daily – this time publicly, working on his book and sharing posts with the world. A period when he realised that he knew nothing and, the more he learned, the clearer it became how little he truly knew – not as regards professional skills or an understanding of our world, but about the overarching universe and our existence as human beings. Decisions made had lost their value and free will seemed not to exist. Everything he had undergone for over forty-three years appeared invalid and required unlearning in the process of discovering who he was and what he was here for. Whatever used to be his reality of happiness and freedom became questionable. The value of logical thought and knowledge began to diminish in the face of changing feelings, intuition and a new calling.

It seemed that life-changing stories and big awakenings were usually presented by gurus, by people who did something really big or crazy or who’d had life-changing, near-death experiences, or by those who had shut down their normal life. He’d made his journey, had some trips, but was just a human being in an IT job, with bills to pay. He did not have an extraordinary awakening. He did not leave his family, spend months in the jungle or win the lottery. He did not have some brilliant idea that made him rich enough to start a philanthropic company to help people. He continued to live, deploying his life vision step by step, in a self-healing and evolutionary journey. He knew that he wanted to help others see the alternative perspective that is around us and is, in the end, the real reality. He wanted to share what he’d learned: that you don’t need to be or do anything super extraordinary or spiritual or become someone else. By being yourself, as ordinary as you are, you can experience the real magic of being and see how extraordinary you really are. The only thing required is that you take that first step and start to open your mind to other perspectives that exist around you, to create the most joyful reality of your life that is only possible for you.

He was one of millions of people, a middle-class worker, clerk and DIY handyman, but he is now building up his consciousness and enjoying his life more and more. As he discovers who he really is, day by day, he is becoming a more conscious creator of his life. If he can do it, everyone can do it, and the universe is going to start helping you the very first moment you decide to pursue it.

1.2 My writing journey

I can’t explain exactly what pushed me to write at least a couple of words every day from Monday 18 September 2023. The idea of producing a book had been with me from the first day I started my transformation journey. Astral readings advised me that sharing knowledge or teaching people was something I should focus on. At the beginning I could not believe it and it felt ridiculous as I did not want to write about IT. While learning about my true self, I could feel that there was something in this message and that one day it was going to happen. It took over three years for the seed to germinate in the soil of my mental stubbornness – maybe it was a process I had to go through to be ready. I collected notes and material and finally put words on paper. I knew that completing a book was something I just had to do along my path.

While looking for solutions to everyday problems, my research led me to look beyond conventional therapies and the material world. I started delving into spirituality – not just energy work, but a deeper connection with the unseen world and the wisdom it carries. During my studies and my transformation from an IT professional’s mental perspective, I could not find a clear way to describe this ‘other world’ into which I was stepping more and more. I read, watched and listened a lot, but it all seemed like a mystery reserved for the select few, or it was written in a way that made it difficult for me to understand. I also saw two unnaturally separated worlds. In one world was science, IT, schools, universities, medicine, doctors, government, shops, corporations, churches, organisations, communities, families, friends and …. Basically, everything that supported our daily life and our felt reality, but which put spirituality under a religious heading or even denied its existence. In the other world was spirituality, which felt totally freaky and, for me, was something to stay away from. Wizards, witches, intuition, aspects of love and energy healing, all made no logical sense. I could not find anything reasonable that I could call spiritual and understand. I was experiencing more and more magic from the non-physical realm, but I was also getting frustrated. I was not able to describe to my friends and family, or even to my patients, what this other world was about and what I was really doing to help them. I was looking for answers, but whatever I found did not resonate with me or my surroundings, which created a desire to fill this gap.

Being able to describe what spirituality is to those who work in IT, in corporations and in mind-driven, reasonable worlds, to remove the mysticism and the out-of-reach perception of sects or religions, appeared to be one of the objectives of my first book. I chose to write it as a memoir, to back it up with my own experiences as real-life examples and the story of my own evolution to make it indisputable, even for the most confirmed unbeliever.

My transformation took place while I was creating a family, having kids, working in IT, being an investor and entrepreneur, a son and brother from a small village in Poland. I am just a man with no special origin, no extraordinary achievements that could exclude me from being perceived as just a human being who decided to look at life from another perspective. In a world where the authority of doctors and scientists is increasingly being questioned, there can be no better example than a transformational experience, described by someone relatable to the reader. My story will speak to readers because I am one of them.

The idea of this book is not only to reduce the mystery or inaccessibility of the spiritual sphere but also to inspire the reader to open their eyes to the unknown, to show that there is more than the logic of the physical world, that there is something outside the confines of our own thoughts. I want my story to show that everyone can take advantage of both mental and mystic worlds. You do not have to dress like a shaman, a hippie or a monk to become aware of the non-physical realm and to see more. You can have a magical life beyond the analytical part of our perception, justified by science and logic. You don’t have to quit your job, travel around the world, divorce, change anything drastically, or become seriously sick to open your eyes and experience the magic of life. I did not have a serious illness; I did not experience a drastic trauma. I did have a complicated family situation, but most people have such challenges. I had a pretty normal life, which allowed me to start my change process. With a little bit of self-work, with open eyes and mind, and by listening to what is around, everyone can better understand their current situation and find solutions.

This book is an attempt to bridge the mental and spiritual worlds, based on my experiences, showing how I began to understand the universal rules of the game called ‘life’. The non-material world plays a bigger role than the physical world we focus on in daily life. We can all discover the beauty of the universe, but we have to keep looking. If we get stuck in an idea that does not serve our purpose, life may force us to move on.

This book should help the reader to at least try to prevent a feeling of regret on the day of death. A regret that they had never tried to be their real self, not having listened to the ever-present inner voice that was forced onto the second plane. It should encourage the reader to listen to their real self, heart and feelings.

This book should also show that viewing spirituality as something that is not real can prevent one from experiencing real-life magic, synchronicity and coherence, while enjoying your real unique self. The only difference between modern witches, wizards and those who know more exists and the reader is that they were just brave enough to open themselves up to this perspective. By showing evidence of my evolution, I hope that everyone can find the shaman waiting to be discovered within.

I also wrote this book for myself, as part of the self-healing and transformation journey that I will continue until the last day of my life. The process never stops, but putting all of this on paper will free up space for other work and experiences in my life. I am also putting this down to remember my path and to be proud of the journey I have undertaken over the years and to thank myself for the courage to ignore everything that my mind was telling me not to do. Everything we do is part of our transformation; in my case, I learned that service to humanity was my own way of bringing the spiritual world closer to reality, to share with my readers and patrons with all love.

Through my process of change, I transformed from a person who thought he knew a lot (at least had his own perception of and opinion on everything and was pushing it around) to someone who started to understand Socrates’ famous quote: ‘The only true wisdom is in knowing you know nothing.’

I started to feel light and began my real learning and transformation journey:

- from thinking that I knew everything to knowing that I knew very little
- from thinking to feeling
- from a conditional to an unconditional approach
- from a materialist looking for profit and my family’s well-being to caring for people and the world
- from a lack of respect to humbleness.

I keep working on myself, changing myself, with awareness and without the presumption that my truth is the only valid truth that will help humanity. With an open mind, I keep learning every day.

I am aware that writing a memoir at my fairly young age could be questioned, however, that is also one of the biggest advantages, as I am close to the age of my readers. Also, I only have a master’s degree in technology, with no high-ranking title or global achievement. I only have this voice in me that made me sit and write for hours, days and weeks. A voice that wanted this book to materialise through me. The world needs consciousness. The feminine part of society is expanding beautifully, but the old masculine way of being is still resisting. Although my book could inspire everybody, I hope to influence men the most.

This book has three main parts:

- the first, covers my story from the time I started my journey, through all its courses, lessons, experiences and retreats
- the second is about the changes I observed in myself over these years, following the new perspective of life I discovered in opening myself to the unknown and all the concepts I learned about
- the third covers some basic guidelines that could be used by anyone as an introduction and inspiration to start working on self-discovery and self-perspective.

There are many like me, who struggle along, open only to the rational part of life, based on experience and what they’ve been taught. Most do not know that they can go beyond their rational mental cage, which shows no sign that anything beyond even exists. People in their mental slavery, covered by unconscious patterns and traumas acquired in this or past lives through the generations, can heal themselves and find true freedom, health, joy and their real self, and in consequence, experience fulfilment. My message will help you to look at life in a broader context and open yourself to spirituality. That you are your own medicine is proof that the world beyond our physical perception exists, and that everyone can experience it and self-healing. You don’t have to be a guru, a doctor, or somebody in authority. If an IT guy did it, everyone can do it just as well. Just ‘take it for granted’ and start your journey.

1.3 Who will benefit most?

This book is directed at everyone who wishes to know a bit about my story of building a bridge between the spiritual and mental worlds. It shows how an IT guy stepped into the world of shamanism and spirituality and kept a balance between his work and his new life. It is a story of opening up my own cage, of learning about the unknown with trust and from having no understanding. It is a story of self-healing that may be about me but is also about everyone who wants to try to find out a bit more about themselves, trusting in themselves as a unique source of knowledge about what is best for them.

This book is really for everyone. You could just read it and do nothing, you may feel that there is nothing new for you to read, or it may open your heart as you recognise something from a past life. Whatever I experienced could have been your experience.

This book is for people who are physically sick or who are experiencing worrying symptoms that are making them look for help. It is for those with depression who have lost their faith in anything. By going to the roots, removing the cause and finding out who you really are, through persistence, change and hard work, you can heal yourself. Yes, it is possible, and it is all in your hands.

This book is for people who feel that something isn’t quite right, who are stuck in a loop of unhappiness, despite having what looks like a dream life – financial abundance and freedom. It’s for those who, despite ticking all those boxes that society equates with success, still feel unfulfilled and may even turn to drugs in search of meaning or as an escape.

This book is for people who could feel and see things when they were little but who denied those skills in adulthood due to the judgement of society. You are not crazy; what you see is real and it just means that you are connected, that it does exist and other people can also see the non-material world.

Although going through trauma or bad experiences usually drives our evolution, I truly believe that with the increasing vibration of the world and the consciousness of people, that may not be necessary. Being conscious that the material, mental world which attracts our full attention is only a tiny part of all that surrounds us may inspire you to seek your path, get to know some rules and find out who you really are without going through severe sickness or accidents. This book could be your eye-opening, protective guide to exploring your own evolutionary path, even if you currently consider your life as normal, containing all that you need as a parent, corporate employee, professional and so on.

Those who are already well along their spiritual path might not find new insights in this book – and that’s okay. Perhaps you can simply see it as one more story, an episode in a spiritual series. At the same time, it might reconnect you with your own journey and develop a deeper understanding of those who are just beginning to awaken – those still on the other side of the bridge.

This book is for people who are open to new perspectives. By looking at things from a new angle, they may find out that what has been true for them was just a projection of their own mind, an illusion. By changing their perspective, they can change their reality.

1.4 Key reading tips

As you read this book, you may understand some topics and not understand others. You may do or change nothing. You may say it is all nonsense and makes no sense. You may stop reading or give this book back. Each situation is the correct one for you.

The fact that you have got this book in your hands is good. Maybe the title attracted you, maybe someone recommended it and your ego told you that it might be good for you; it really does not matter. If you have this book, it means that you were vibrating in a way to attract it, which means that you may be ready to start understanding it. A seed is being planted and you need to feed it to get it growing. It may be the autumn or winter of your change and you need to wait. Spring growth will come, as will your change and understanding.

Some of the content could shock you, or you may say that I took good drugs to write it. However, I can assure you that every word in this book was written consciously, without taking drugs or alcohol. I was in the same state as I when doing my daily corporate job. Sometimes it takes a shock, a sense of disgust, or even a decline to open up another layer within you. Every sentence will plant something. You may even disagree and finally bin this book. Do whatever feels best for you. All reactions are okay.

After the battle of reading, understanding or not, agreeing or disagreeing, you may notice a change. One day you do not understand or you disagree, a couple of days, weeks or months later... you finally get to the point when it all makes sense, and you start getting the feeling. It is a totally natural process of raising your vibration to attract the best experience and learning to yourself. The process requires you to trust first, surrender, let it go, even if your brain is telling you that it all makes no logical sense. If you do that, the day will come when you understand and experience all that is written here. Just take it step by step.

Everyone is different, with a different background and history, growing up in environments that can’t be compared. As a result, the process of understanding or change is going to be different for everyone. Your friend, family or partner may understand more than you or they may have no clue what you are talking about. That is natural and should not be judged. Understanding comes to everyone at different times and in different ways. Whatever happens to you as you read, whatever reaction or feeling is triggered, it is the best for you.

Please do not get scared while reading; some aspects may appear crazy. I can assure you that everything related here was experienced by me, the IT guy, husband and father who, after every experience, was always able to continue his daily duties – although sometimes it took a couple of days to get grounded.

The most important thing is that, in order to understand, you may have to change the way you think, to free yourself from the confines created by your own reality over years, lives and generations.

Are you ready to jump in and immerse yourself in the journey of self-healing through consciousness and understanding?

Are you ready to give up your old patterns and ways of living or do you need some more time?

There is no correct answer a quote from Hippocrates may be helpful here: ‘Before you heal someone, ask him if he’s willing to give up the things that make him sick.’

This book presents my journey and my perceptions, proven by my experiences and the lessons I was able to learn. For sure, my life has aspects that are yet to be understood. I am not trying to persuade you that any one way is correct, it is all about building another perspective on everyday life that you may decide to embrace – or not.

I use two names to describe who I became, medicine man and shaman. These two aspects are often distinguished, where shaman is related to spirituality and medicine man is primarily focused on healing. Everyone is free to use any concept or name. In my life and in this book, I use both terms interchangeably as these aspects are inseparable and actually make up the same role. From my experience, everyone is their own shaman, and everyone is their own medicine man or woman. We may differ in our level of awareness and the use of this knowledge in our lives, which affects the experiences we choose to have in this life and our vibrations.

The healing described in this book is related to the building up of consciousness and to becoming aware of what was making me sick. Through understanding healing happens as causes are removed. Our subconscious contains information not only from the realm that we can see, but also from our childhood and what we may call past lives. Through understanding the background to my conscious and subconscious selves, I was able to change my life and heal myself on the step-by-step journey described in these pages.

1.5 Before you begin